his name? smalls.
he has two more tank friends... his massive body just covers every inch of them.
he has two more tank friends... his massive body just covers every inch of them.
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Friday, February 11, 2011
seattle, mid july
dearest katy, i WILL be attending your california dreams concert...
and i'll make everyone go oh! oh! oh! #representin'
Thursday, February 10, 2011
the internet is a telephone service that's gotten uppity
today, (as if it isn't obvious enough) i'm so thankful for technology.
you see... i haven't heard from my dear brother scott for months now. of course he sends the family emails here and there, but our one on one chats have been put on pause for too long. so when i checked my email in class today i was about as giddy as a school girl when i saw his name pop up in my inbox.
the subject of the email; KENG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
so simple. but i knew that email was for me, and only me. that's whats up.
it fathoms me how scott automatically knows when i'm having a bad day, a bad week, or a bad month. he's 1,759 miles away (which is only 1 day and 7 hours worth of driving........hmmm...;)), but it never fails. he always, and i mean always knows. no matter what the situation is, small or large, i hear from him before i even consider sending him a pity email of my insignificant problems. and yes, he's in the most spiritual moment of his life. he's probably receiving some type of "revelation" about me, because the things he says makes me look at everything in a whole other light. i don't feel as unimportant when i talk to scooter.
he knows more about myself then i do, and he dreams all of it. you all may think i sound crazy, but i can't even count how many times his emails have been filled with different dreams about me, his sassy younger sister. of course i've dreamt about scott, i miss him. but nothing as serious as what he dreams about. all i can say is..
i've been told more then once in my life, by very prestige priesthood holders, that the adversary craves me. as i'm sure it does many of us in this time. i've never been so terrified of something so powerful, and to live in constant fear of having to face it alone haunts me. but today i realized that i'm not alone. scott is holding my hand every step of the way. he's been here the entire time. pulling me away from every cliff, throwing himself in front of every bullet, and egging whoever's house that messes with me. (you know who you are)
sometimes i feel so alone out here by myself, and then i get over it. but i couldn't do it without my big brother. even if he's in a whole different country.
169 days
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Monday, February 7, 2011
i would rather be home alone then out with a guy who sells socks on the internet
no, i did not go out on a date with a guy who sells socks on the internet. but i think it says something when i kind of wish he did. that way we could have had something interesting to talk about to talk about. sooo, the guy who hit on me at school, had been asking me out every night since. and i'm sorry, but if you want to do something at 12:00 in the morning, i'm going to say no. (unless i think it may be worth it) but, if it's a first date type of deal.. i have school at 8:30 and i would rather not do that whole late nighter thing with someone i hardly know and blah blah blah. anyways! he keeps asking and asking, so friday night there's a black tie party at noahs in lindon. me and all of the roommates are going, so i figure i'd invite the kid. i would be with my roommates too, so maybe it wouldn't be as bad... well jokes on me. it was awful.
it's a black tie event right? they're doing a money drop, handing out free redbull, there is going to be a giant dance floor, and apparently this is utah's "hottest party of the year". so we get all glammed up in black dresses, curly hair, and seductive makeup and run out to meet, lets call him bob, in the parking lot. i should've realized the miss-communication when he was wearing a coat that went to his ankles and an oh so proper outfit underneath. i instantly felt like a tramp. giving him the benefit of the doubt, me and katelyn hoped in his car and off we were.
we got there way too early. and i knew we would, leaving at 9:00... but bob insisted we left early enough. we showed up, and again.. being way too early. we explored and then took a seat, waiting for the rest of our friends to arrive. before i begin, this place was AWESOME. noah's is this giant entertainment lodge kind of thing. there's four levels. on the first there is rooms with half kitchens in every one, some had pool and ping pong, there was a "security room" where everyone could put their things. the room had only glass walls and had security guarding everything. oh, and there wasn't only security guards in that room, there was security outside of every entry, inside on every floor, in every hallway and inside every room. legit right? the first floor also had the giant dance floor, entry to the garden/grass area outside, bathrooms, staircases, and elevators. the second floor had another dance floor, with more rooms filled with couches for everyone to hang out it, a theater room, which was playing movies as the night went on, and more bathrooms and locked rooms. the third floor had yet again, another dance floor. more locked bedrooms, and another room filled with pool, ping pong, a television, and a kitchen. the fourth floor was exposed to the outside, and was suppose to have ice skating, but all the ice had melted. lame. the entire building was made of concrete, and was beautiful. half of the inside was just plain, exposed cement, and the other half was pretty painted walls, but everything else was up to date furniture and kitchen ware, hardwood floors, and exposed ceilings. it was beautiful.
alright, back to my date. we show up, and are waiting for the rest of our fraaans. so we take a seat in the first room. we really weren't missing much because there was literally only five people on the dance floor, and bucket loads of people still coming in. and let me remind you, it's about 9:30 at this point, and this is just pure awkwardness. alright, key number one. a first date doesn't mean we're engaged. so don't be all over me like you own me. bob was a repeat offender of this. HE WAS CONSTANTLY TOUCHING ME, and not the cute kind. the creepy lingering kind. whenever he would talk to me he would let his hand linger to wherever the crap it felt like lingering to, and it would stay there... he was even doing it to katelyn! we have an apartment joke that is "accepting people into our personal bubble." (it's from a dating book my mother gave me.. yes. a dating book..) and if you're digging someone you let them into your personal bubble of space. well, i never invited bob into my bubble, but he was all up in it. with his face and lets not forget those lingering hands! i started to count the awkward glances we got from people, and the last thing i want is any of these single, tall, dark, and handsome men at this giant party to think is that i'm about to marry this stranger. so at this point i'm starting to get bugged.
so we decide to walk to the next level. and we get up there and found a few people we knew. so we're talking, it's whatever. thankfully bob isn't all up in my george foreman at that moment. and then i hear someone calling my name. jameson gilbert. FINALLY! a different guy i know that can help me escape from bob for just a couple of minutes at least. so i run over to jameson and give him a fat hug. later kate told me that while me and jameson were embracing bobs face was this...
it's a black tie event right? they're doing a money drop, handing out free redbull, there is going to be a giant dance floor, and apparently this is utah's "hottest party of the year". so we get all glammed up in black dresses, curly hair, and seductive makeup and run out to meet, lets call him bob, in the parking lot. i should've realized the miss-communication when he was wearing a coat that went to his ankles and an oh so proper outfit underneath. i instantly felt like a tramp. giving him the benefit of the doubt, me and katelyn hoped in his car and off we were.
we got there way too early. and i knew we would, leaving at 9:00... but bob insisted we left early enough. we showed up, and again.. being way too early. we explored and then took a seat, waiting for the rest of our friends to arrive. before i begin, this place was AWESOME. noah's is this giant entertainment lodge kind of thing. there's four levels. on the first there is rooms with half kitchens in every one, some had pool and ping pong, there was a "security room" where everyone could put their things. the room had only glass walls and had security guarding everything. oh, and there wasn't only security guards in that room, there was security outside of every entry, inside on every floor, in every hallway and inside every room. legit right? the first floor also had the giant dance floor, entry to the garden/grass area outside, bathrooms, staircases, and elevators. the second floor had another dance floor, with more rooms filled with couches for everyone to hang out it, a theater room, which was playing movies as the night went on, and more bathrooms and locked rooms. the third floor had yet again, another dance floor. more locked bedrooms, and another room filled with pool, ping pong, a television, and a kitchen. the fourth floor was exposed to the outside, and was suppose to have ice skating, but all the ice had melted. lame. the entire building was made of concrete, and was beautiful. half of the inside was just plain, exposed cement, and the other half was pretty painted walls, but everything else was up to date furniture and kitchen ware, hardwood floors, and exposed ceilings. it was beautiful.
alright, back to my date. we show up, and are waiting for the rest of our fraaans. so we take a seat in the first room. we really weren't missing much because there was literally only five people on the dance floor, and bucket loads of people still coming in. and let me remind you, it's about 9:30 at this point, and this is just pure awkwardness. alright, key number one. a first date doesn't mean we're engaged. so don't be all over me like you own me. bob was a repeat offender of this. HE WAS CONSTANTLY TOUCHING ME, and not the cute kind. the creepy lingering kind. whenever he would talk to me he would let his hand linger to wherever the crap it felt like lingering to, and it would stay there... he was even doing it to katelyn! we have an apartment joke that is "accepting people into our personal bubble." (it's from a dating book my mother gave me.. yes. a dating book..) and if you're digging someone you let them into your personal bubble of space. well, i never invited bob into my bubble, but he was all up in it. with his face and lets not forget those lingering hands! i started to count the awkward glances we got from people, and the last thing i want is any of these single, tall, dark, and handsome men at this giant party to think is that i'm about to marry this stranger. so at this point i'm starting to get bugged.
so we decide to walk to the next level. and we get up there and found a few people we knew. so we're talking, it's whatever. thankfully bob isn't all up in my george foreman at that moment. and then i hear someone calling my name. jameson gilbert. FINALLY! a different guy i know that can help me escape from bob for just a couple of minutes at least. so i run over to jameson and give him a fat hug. later kate told me that while me and jameson were embracing bobs face was this...
but of course, it was a guy's face. and i was like...
he was seriously giving me a satanic psycho look. who does that? the night progressed, and amberli and our other peeps showed up. so we started to evacuate the dance floor. and yes, as we entered the dance floor bob started the lingering touching back up again. i was vexed, vexed enough to almost turn around and punch him square in the face. it had passed the uncomfortable part, and was now sinking in the lake of fury. any where i moved, his hand was on my back, his other grabbing my arm, like i was his mother in disneyland. i was waiting for him to wrap around my leg, and make me drag him around the dance floor. the night was crashing, and crashing fast. i kept dancing, avoiding him as much as possible with him still breathing down my neck. and when it got too hot, we all ran outside to let the february utah air cool us down. when we were all outside, i was as alert as an owl. waiting for bob's hand to feel me up anytime soon. and as i looked around, i couldnt find bob anywhere. this was the biggest relief of the night. he had lost me. bob had lost me.
we went back onto the floor and kept dancing. and i wasn't as worried about finding bob, because he had plenty of friends there and looking for someone specific at this point of the night was like trying to find a needle in a haystack. there were people literally shoulder to shoulder, and that made it impossible to find anyone. the group of us wondered upstairs, and as we got to the third floor we all got locked up there.
bummer..... i'm stuck upstairs with all my girl friends, an open dance floor and breathing room. and they really weren't letting anyone in or out of the third floor. complete lock down.
after we all had recouped we sweet talked a security guard into escorting us back downstairs. the bitter looks we got from everyone was priceless, because he was taking us and only us back down. not going to lie, i loved the special treatment. and he wasn't even feeling me up! the party was practically over, and we were ready to go home. but lets not forget, bob is our ride home..
so we get back down to the first floor and are slowly wondering around, and BAM! bob pops up out of no where. he tells us to wait in the first room, while he goes and grabs a drink, and then we'll head home. we sat in that room at least 45 minutes, thinking for sure bob had left us. which would of been understandable, since we were apart for most of the night. but he came back. took us to the car, and we were gone. the ride home was awkward to say the least. he told me that we could've called a taxi, instead of making him to us. but let me tell you all, that wasn't my intentions at all. the thought of using him for a ride is way too evil for me to do. i'm not a mean girl. i really wanted to get to know him, but bringing him to a giant party probably wasn't the best way to get to know someone. but as we continued to drive home he chewed our ears off. little did we know, he thought it was a "mocktail" party. with maybe 100 people, orderves, fancy none alcoholic drinks, and jazz music. he made it very clear that the event we just attended was NOT his scene. and then he started apologizing to me for loosing me at the beginning of the night. wait. i'm getting apologized to for loosing YOU. bless you're heart. but he kept bashing on everyone there, the girls that wouldn't dance with him, the "juice head" guys who just lift weights and have pea sized brains. (which i'm sure there was a few there, but classifying every guy there like that, guys that me and kate knew, that's a little overboard.) as we entered provo he kept dropping hint after hint that he wanted to hang out some more. but me and kate had had enough. more then enough. as we entered the raintree parking lot, he was on my last nerve, and then BOOM. he bashed hair school. that last nerve exploaded i was about to tuck and roll, and get my ginger self out of that car. he walked us to the door, and being a loyal roommate kate waited for me to say my goodbyes. we hugged, my back turned to katelyn, and he literally stared kate down giving her the hint to leave. i tried letting go, but oh no. he tightened the hug, and i again tried to let go, AND HE TIGHTENED THE HUG AGAIN. my life started to flash before my eyes until he finally loosened up his grip and i was able to run to the door.
me and katelyn ran to our beds, and sure enough bob texts me wanting to "talk it out." we couldn't help but giggle off the fact that i had been engaged to this man, and had had a fight with him to the point where we had to talk it out all in one night. talk about a fast mover. i was so done with it, and my bed had never been so comfortable.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
beauty reflects in your eyes
once again, my heart is still racing from today.
i found a buyer for my itouch, and they bought for almost twice of what i asked for. she was a cute blonde, who had just graduated hair school herself. she had passed her state boards and was already certified. i felt like i was selling electronics in the cosmetology black market when she handed me almost $300 in cash, and then left marinello. did you catch that? three hounded dollars. my mind was blown. ca-ching! so, i rewarded myself with extensions :) i love them! and this is so sad, but i feel gorgeous with them in.. i might not ever take them out even. but hey! guess who got hit on minutes after she put those bad boys in? this girl... it's all the hair baby, all the hair..
my new goal is to get my hair this long... naturally.
we totally had a relief society moment at school today. our class has been through a twelve week exercise together with the esthetician instructor, and today was the end of our little sessions. some of the girls had to give speeches, and of course it was a tear fest the entire time. we all have made fun of these speeches for weeks, thinking that they were pointless ooey gooey heart to heart talks that none of us needed. but at the end of it we were all fixing our tear stained faces and having confessions of how much we all needed each other. dardy, little miss hawaii, said in her speech that it was no "accident" or "coincidence" that we were all placed together for this entire year of school. and that was more obvious today then it has ever been before. i never thought i could get this close with strangers, but everyday i look at each of them and they all feel like old friends.our instructor becky, made it a point to tell us all that she had never been so emotionally intimate with a group of students in all her years of teaching. we could all feel what she was talking about. the air was thick, and whatever was roaming in it, most likely hairspray, was bringing all of us closer.
once everyone had wrapped up their speeches, the esthetician instructor told us a story of two men in a hospital room, who were both bed ridden. one of the men's bed was right next to the window, and the other man who was across the room couldnt see out of the window. so for days, that turned into weeks, which turned into months, the man by the window would describe what he saw out that window, to the man across the room. he would tell him about the big, strong trees, the beautiful mountains, the pond filled with lilly pads, the dozens of birds, the bright green grass, and the charming people that roamed in the scene that illuminated his window every second. then one day, the man by the window passed away. the other man asked the nurse if he could be moved to the other bed, the one by the window, so he could finally see with his own two eyes the heaven on earth that had been described to him for months. the nurse moved him no problem, and finally when the man was able to gaze out the window, he found himself in a state of sheer disappointment. the nurse listened to the mans story of how the man by the window described what he saw every day to him, and that he had done this up to the day of his death, but now as he looked out for the window for himself none of these lovely things were there. he kept begging the nurse for answers as he asked over and over again where all that beauty had disappeared to. the nurse looked back at the man and said.. "sir, that man was blind."
this story instantly taught each of us a lesson. it's true, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. how many times have you driven the same path to school, seen the same people, done the same thing, and never noticed the beauty that surrounds you daily? if you haven't noticed a single thing, you might as well be blind. bailey told us a story of how she was at one of her church's christian concerts, and she saw a women dancing her heart out. the bandana that hugged her balding head made it obvious that she was fighting cancer, but as bailey watched her, this cancer ridden women was having the time of her life. and it was the most beautiful thing bailey had ever seen.
so give it a rest and just look.
i found a buyer for my itouch, and they bought for almost twice of what i asked for. she was a cute blonde, who had just graduated hair school herself. she had passed her state boards and was already certified. i felt like i was selling electronics in the cosmetology black market when she handed me almost $300 in cash, and then left marinello. did you catch that? three hounded dollars. my mind was blown. ca-ching! so, i rewarded myself with extensions :) i love them! and this is so sad, but i feel gorgeous with them in.. i might not ever take them out even. but hey! guess who got hit on minutes after she put those bad boys in? this girl... it's all the hair baby, all the hair..
my new goal is to get my hair this long... naturally.
we totally had a relief society moment at school today. our class has been through a twelve week exercise together with the esthetician instructor, and today was the end of our little sessions. some of the girls had to give speeches, and of course it was a tear fest the entire time. we all have made fun of these speeches for weeks, thinking that they were pointless ooey gooey heart to heart talks that none of us needed. but at the end of it we were all fixing our tear stained faces and having confessions of how much we all needed each other. dardy, little miss hawaii, said in her speech that it was no "accident" or "coincidence" that we were all placed together for this entire year of school. and that was more obvious today then it has ever been before. i never thought i could get this close with strangers, but everyday i look at each of them and they all feel like old friends.our instructor becky, made it a point to tell us all that she had never been so emotionally intimate with a group of students in all her years of teaching. we could all feel what she was talking about. the air was thick, and whatever was roaming in it, most likely hairspray, was bringing all of us closer.
once everyone had wrapped up their speeches, the esthetician instructor told us a story of two men in a hospital room, who were both bed ridden. one of the men's bed was right next to the window, and the other man who was across the room couldnt see out of the window. so for days, that turned into weeks, which turned into months, the man by the window would describe what he saw out that window, to the man across the room. he would tell him about the big, strong trees, the beautiful mountains, the pond filled with lilly pads, the dozens of birds, the bright green grass, and the charming people that roamed in the scene that illuminated his window every second. then one day, the man by the window passed away. the other man asked the nurse if he could be moved to the other bed, the one by the window, so he could finally see with his own two eyes the heaven on earth that had been described to him for months. the nurse moved him no problem, and finally when the man was able to gaze out the window, he found himself in a state of sheer disappointment. the nurse listened to the mans story of how the man by the window described what he saw every day to him, and that he had done this up to the day of his death, but now as he looked out for the window for himself none of these lovely things were there. he kept begging the nurse for answers as he asked over and over again where all that beauty had disappeared to. the nurse looked back at the man and said.. "sir, that man was blind."
this story instantly taught each of us a lesson. it's true, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. how many times have you driven the same path to school, seen the same people, done the same thing, and never noticed the beauty that surrounds you daily? if you haven't noticed a single thing, you might as well be blind. bailey told us a story of how she was at one of her church's christian concerts, and she saw a women dancing her heart out. the bandana that hugged her balding head made it obvious that she was fighting cancer, but as bailey watched her, this cancer ridden women was having the time of her life. and it was the most beautiful thing bailey had ever seen.
so give it a rest and just look.
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
everybody likes a roller coaster ride
my heart is still racing from today.
got to school bright and early, talked to the boss and got more hours. i'll be caught up in no time now... kristine is an intimidating lady, and talking to her about getting extra hours is a bit terrifying. you have to earn them by being on time, staying for your regular scheduled hours, and then staying for the extra hours she's already giving you. telling her why i wanted more hours, not only to get caught up for school, but to go on a spring break trip and possibly go home this summer, i felt was a bit of a rissskaayy move, but she was more excited then i was. she had an entire plan laid out before my eyes in seconds. thanks for believing in me, recognizing my progress, and rewarding me. you'da you'da best.
i got a mysterious $5 dollar tip, from no one else but the tip fairy. i checked my tips from last week on saturday, and i got all of them. there's no explanation for where that extra money came from, but i need it. and then the bang trim, the only appointment i got today, tipped me $5 too! $10 in tips, for nothing but a bang trim? thank you tip fairy. you amaze me. the money went right into my saving envelope... :)
if you know the moberg family at all, you know that we have handfuls of ipods floating around our house that we never touch. and i've dragged a few down to utah with me. so, for extra cash i put my itouch up on KSL and was flooded with phone calls in literally seconds. one guy wanted me to meet him in the raintree parking lot, in the green car by the trash can. uhm, what? you think i'm that stupid. one guy called, and i had to break the news that i had a bidder higher then him already. his response in his arabian accent was, "you f***ed up." and then he hung up the phone. those two gave me the creeps... but i have a few bidders who are willing to buy this bad boy for $175. can you say deal? being rushed with so many phone calls and text in seconds almost made my heart explode, so me and kate went and got a cupcake.. again. they're just so delicious! and they take the edge right off. magic i tell you.. magic.
ms. caitlynn lawson is trying out for "so you think you can dance" this weekend. and mattie got tickets? whaaaa? we're going down to salt lake thursday to support our fellow dance mate. she's going to tear it up. i cannot wait to cheer you on caitlynn. oh, and you know i'm hoping to see cat deeley with her awesome accent.
i can't wait for this weekend, for spring break, and for summer.
(well to be honest, i can't wait to go to bed right now.)
tonight i'll fall asleep without a single tear falling from these big hazel eyes.
i have a plan, i know what i'm doing, i believe in myself, and i know it's all possible.
got to school bright and early, talked to the boss and got more hours. i'll be caught up in no time now... kristine is an intimidating lady, and talking to her about getting extra hours is a bit terrifying. you have to earn them by being on time, staying for your regular scheduled hours, and then staying for the extra hours she's already giving you. telling her why i wanted more hours, not only to get caught up for school, but to go on a spring break trip and possibly go home this summer, i felt was a bit of a rissskaayy move, but she was more excited then i was. she had an entire plan laid out before my eyes in seconds. thanks for believing in me, recognizing my progress, and rewarding me. you'da you'da best.
i got a mysterious $5 dollar tip, from no one else but the tip fairy. i checked my tips from last week on saturday, and i got all of them. there's no explanation for where that extra money came from, but i need it. and then the bang trim, the only appointment i got today, tipped me $5 too! $10 in tips, for nothing but a bang trim? thank you tip fairy. you amaze me. the money went right into my saving envelope... :)
if you know the moberg family at all, you know that we have handfuls of ipods floating around our house that we never touch. and i've dragged a few down to utah with me. so, for extra cash i put my itouch up on KSL and was flooded with phone calls in literally seconds. one guy wanted me to meet him in the raintree parking lot, in the green car by the trash can. uhm, what? you think i'm that stupid. one guy called, and i had to break the news that i had a bidder higher then him already. his response in his arabian accent was, "you f***ed up." and then he hung up the phone. those two gave me the creeps... but i have a few bidders who are willing to buy this bad boy for $175. can you say deal? being rushed with so many phone calls and text in seconds almost made my heart explode, so me and kate went and got a cupcake.. again. they're just so delicious! and they take the edge right off. magic i tell you.. magic.
ms. caitlynn lawson is trying out for "so you think you can dance" this weekend. and mattie got tickets? whaaaa? we're going down to salt lake thursday to support our fellow dance mate. she's going to tear it up. i cannot wait to cheer you on caitlynn. oh, and you know i'm hoping to see cat deeley with her awesome accent.
i can't wait for this weekend, for spring break, and for summer.
(well to be honest, i can't wait to go to bed right now.)
tonight i'll fall asleep without a single tear falling from these big hazel eyes.
i have a plan, i know what i'm doing, i believe in myself, and i know it's all possible.
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