the family is a haven in a heartless world

alright. i'll admit it.

i've watched "kim kardashians dream wedding" on E almost 70 times since it's premiered, ONLY BECAUSE they play reruns of it almost every day!

...and because at night i put a long black wig on and prance around pretending to be kim herself.

NOT. 

her wedding is probably the most extravagant and detailed wedding my little ginger eyes have ever seen. she only spent $20 million, and even had a wedding cake with the hefty price of $20,000. paahhhhh! when i hear $20,000 a think of a brand new car, or paying off my schooling. not a fetching cake.. that thing better of had pure gold in it.

anyways... behind all that money, i've came to realize that kim actually has a heart.

yes, an 11 ounce blood filled muscle.

you see, kim's dad died yeaarrs back and as she prepares for her wedding she realizes how much she really wishes her dad was there to walk her down the isle. 

she has a meltdown in part one (maybe part two, that's how extravagant this things was.. there's two parts!) and tells her step pape that she's forgetting what this is all really about.

and what is it all really about you may ask..

family

duh.

sometimes i have random nightmares about getting that phone call telling me someone in my family died, and then i wake up and facebook creep each and every one of my family members to my hearts content... and then i get over it.

moments like that are when i realize and remember how important my family is to me.

i dont think i've ever been so family oriented.

i'm missing my nephews and niece more and more as each day passes. 

sometimes i wish someone would chuck a sippy cup at my face, or rock my lip with a binky so i can somewhat pretend to be home dinking around with them.

i miss their silly little questions, and their stories that take hours to tell but if i told them it would take a minute tops. (those are the best stories.)

AND i want to hear the songs they learned at kindergarten, or hear them state the pledge of allegiance that they've just mastered for the first time.

i miss all of that.

and of course i miss my mama and pops. 

every time i hop on the back of my boy from 332's motorcycle and go for a joy ride i instantly think of sturgis and how painful my dads passenger seat was. 

...the one the size of a pokemon card and hard as asphalt...

but oh, how fun it was so sit on the back of that and ride for miles.

yes, i got sunburned practically to the core. yes, my hips were cramping the whole time. yes, i couldn't feel my bum whatsoever. and yes, everyone thought me and my dad were lovers.

but i will never forget that ride.

riding through each town my dad told me some type of story about it, and plus i straight up bonded with him for miles and miles.. clutching onto him like the iron rod.

now my mama... she's a riot.

i'm not sure what happened when me and scott left the big ML, and came down to utah but whatever it is... i like it.

she sends me the witty's texts and whenever i give her tude she owns me with comebacks.

it reminds me of a certain day my senior year. (dont worry guys.. i know what ya'll are thinking.. which day!? were drugs involved?! sorry to dissapoint.. but no..) anways! i was perched on our ottoman/giant footstool in our front room giving my mom sas as she fluttered around in the kitchen. my back was to her as we were giving each other a hard time about who knows what and as i was waiting for her comeback i heard something coming towards me and it was coming fast.. 

next thing i know there's my mom, throwing her palms at my shoulders and shoving me off the ottoman onto the ground. i'm pretty sure i just laid there like a new born baby calf, not knowing how to stand yet or anything, my eye's wide open, jaw dropped.

she sturtted back to the kitchen and let out a slight chuckle.

that was the day i knew my mama loved me.

now she even follows me on pinterest.

i can tell her anything and i use to not be able to do that, or even want to! but now i can't wait to call her up after a date, or vent to her about life.

even when she isn't listening and just watching people get arrested from outside of the office, (...seriously though) that women just keeps on surprising me.

now my siblings... i wish we were all midgets without a care in the world again.  

even though half of them have babies and live far far away, and are either doing a residency somewhere, still in school, or changing diapers we all find times to send each other nerdy texts or pictures of our bat cupcakes or halloween costumes.

one thing i miss the most is our sunday dinners where we would have to run and grab the piano bench so all of us could fit at the dinning table.

and when one of us would be a bit too sensitive and run downstairs mid meal after being picked on (cough. cough. me. probably for being a ginger or having albino skin), they always had someone chasing them to cheer them up.

now a days i never dare runaway from a meal, no matter how much i'm being picked on because not only am i still a ginger, or albino, i'm a heffer. 

now all i want to do now is listen to "ghetto cowboy" by bone thugs & harmony, since that was only our anthem as kids.

...and i want my mamas red velvet cake. 

or maybe her carmel bars..

or both.

 

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